Without stepping into that overdone, slightly-boring-now territory of ‘new year, new me’, we’re casting the spotlight on sex lives and asking: are you genuinely happy and fully satisfied in yours?
If the answer isn’t an immediate yes, now is the time to show your sex life some love. There’s so much pressure to maintain an exciting sex life but the truth is, it’s not all that hard to keep things spiced up and interesting – it simply takes a little time and effort.
Here, we discuss how you can reignite the passion in (and out of) the bedroom.
Don’t be afraid to talk about sex
We can’t say this enough – open and honest communication is crucial here. If you’d like to implement changes in your sex life, let your partner in on it.
Opening up the conversation may find them in agreement with you about the need to change things up, and importantly, start the ball rolling with where you go from there. In talking openly, you’ll find out more about each other’s likes and preferences in the bedroom and perhaps do more of it.
The secret here is that you shouldn’t ever stop talking. Post-sex discussions may sound pretty boring but they’re a great way to find out what you each loved (and not so loved) about the session.
Self love all the way
Whether you’re coupled up or not, indulging in a bit of ‘me’ time is a must this year. Masturbation is mood-boosting, improves sleep, reduces stress and increases body confidence. That’s reason enough to jump into bed with your favorite toy!
But as well as this, really exploring your body can help you identify what you like and where you like being touched – and this is need-to-know information for your partner! Get our top tips for ways to enjoy self love without the guilt.
Discover your favorite toys
Far from simply being for solo play, sex toys should be your go-to in ramping up that passion factor. If you’ve never used sex toys before, they can be a little intimidating. But talk openly with your partner about what you’d like to try (and what you’d like to avoid) and go shopping together for toys, whether for him or her, and it’s a great way to add a little excitement to what’s likely become routine.
Sex toys add another dimension to our sexual encounters because they bring sensations that aren’t always possible at just the human touch – and advanced technology has worked wonders for the modern-day sex toy.
The KEON sets a new standard for interactive pleasure – it’s the most powerful automated masturbator for men. Meanwhile, toys like the OhMiBod Esca 2, a wearable massager, are also Bluetooth-enabled, so pleasure can be controlled without even touching. Given that KIIROO’s interactive toys connect lovers from anywhere in the world, they’re great for long-distance relationships that need spicing up.
Nervous to broach the topic with your significant other? Don’t be – take a look at our guide that explains how to introduce sex toys into your relationship.
Take sex classes
Let’s take it back to basics. Being a great lover isn’t something that’s inherent – it’s learned behavior. Sex classes exist to help you sharpen your sex skills, learn new tricks and get inspiration for reigniting the flame that once burned fiercely.
Whether you can find a class in real life that’s local to you or you’d prefer to browse the vast virtual world of sex seminars, taking a sex class comes as a much-recommended pastime. If you’re not quite ready to tackle one in real life, sites like Oschool, which is a judgment-free sexual wellness education platform, help you keep your anonymity while brushing up on all things sexual.
Avoid the bedroom
Just for a little while. Get a little out of that comfort zone and take the sex anywhere else in your home. Of course, the bedroom is synonymous with sex but this makes it routine – which is exactly what you’re trying to break away from. The kitchen, the shower, the sofa… The possibilities for your new-look positions are endless.
Find the fun in foreplay
Stop focusing on the end goal – it’s time to slow things down and live in the moment. Too often we hurry through sex, trying to reach the end goal of the big ‘O’ and get back to our busy lifestyles. Let’s practice more mindful sex.
Take the time to really be present during foreplay and make sure to notice every feeling, texture, smell and taste that you experience. In doing this, you’ll feel heightened arousal and a greater sense of intimacy with your partner. With a focus on foreplay, accessories like silk ties, chocolate and lube can really heat things up.
For more ideas to heighten the pleasure in the bedroom, take a look at the best sex toys for couples and prepare for intimacy on a whole new level.