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What’s Ethical Non-Monogamy?

KIIROO, Cheating, and Ethical Non-Monogamy

There’s been some concern that KIIROO devices would make it easier for partners to cheat. We don’t believe that’s the case. Cheating will happen with or without the latest technology. KIIROO aims to keep people together, not drive them apart.

Ethical, consensual non-monogamy is very different from cheating. In order to use KIIROO devices with partners other than your primary partner, you would have to get in touch with them through a resource other than the KIIROO platform, which does not currently allow for stranger interaction.

For this reason, we do expect to see some third-party KIIROO forums pop up, particularly around kink communities. These, together with KIIROO Onyx+ and Pearl2, will be awesome resources for anyone who is interested in opening up their relationship but wants to try it out online before committing to anything physical, in person.

Ok, so you’re interested in ethical non-monogamy

It’s becoming increasingly common for couples to open up their relationship in one way or another. This might be because of distance, time, or just the realization that they’d like to experience some more variety.

Some people are polychromatic, which means that they’re capable of forming strong romantic bonds with multiple people, all coexisting peacefully. Their love for one person doesn’t detract from their love for another. Often, these people have one primary partner, whom they sometimes live with or are perhaps married to.

Some people just like to have casual sex with partners who are different from their primary partner. These couples might enjoy threesomes, or they might enjoy individual conquests.

Remember: Communication is Key

No matter what the arrangement is, these couples all have one thing in common: In order for it to work, they have to practice excellent communication skills. They must articulate clearly what they are and are not comfortable with. They must make it known if they feel that their relationship needs some time to refocus without any outside partners. They must be open and honest with each other about their needs.

If you’re interested in opening up your relationship, do a lot of talking with your partner. More importantly, listen to what your partner has to say. Assess whether this is something you both really want. Will you both look for outside partners? Will you look for someone to share an experience with for just one night? What are the rules?

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Read up!

Then, do some reading. Opening Up by Tristan Taormino is a wonderful guide to all kinds of open relationship configurations. The Ethical Slut by Janet Hardy and Dossie Easton is one of the most popular books ever written about ethical non-monogamy.

Life On the Swingset is a fantastic blog and podcast about swinging, polyamory, and other forms of nonmonogamy. The Redhead Bedhead has written some fantastic pieces on ethical non-monogamy, in particular, the experience of compersion – when you’re happy for your partner while they enjoy their time with someone else.

Keep talking.

Before you dive in, make sure you and your partner are on the same page. This should be something you do to add to your relationship, not a last-ditch effort to make a failing relationship work out.

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