By LeNair Xavier

I am straight porn stud, Zen Massif’s, lover. Actually, I’m his husband. For 5 years now.

Yes, I am a male. And yes, Zen does straight porn. Neither of us are okay with the idea of him being marketed as “straight-for-pay". Because he, like myself, is a proud bisexual man and doesn’t like the idea of monetizing our orientation.

Hence why he makes verbal agreements with porn companies to not market him as “straight-for-pay”. Making an audio recording as a precautionary measure just in case a company breaches their agreement.

Zen’s bisexuality is like mine, in which he is a lot more gay than straight. The difference between us is that while I often use blatant flirtation with women to cure my straight cravings, Zen needs actual sex to cure his.

For now, doing porn is Zen’s means to do that. Porn however is not about money for us. It’s about the exhibitionism of his straight side, while his sexual escapades with me is how we both display our exhibitionism of our gayness. The money is a fringe benefit.

With that, I can proudly say that I am by no means a secret. Every set Zen has ever worked on knows of me. I’ve been to events with him. Even made out, had three-ways, and attended orgies with some of his female scene partners with them fully aware of who I am.

He’s also done interviews. Not many since he’s a male performer in straight porn. Still, for some odd reason, questions of his off-camera life that would reveal him being married, and me as his spouse have yet to come up. And being the team that we are, we agreed that if such a question ever does come up, he has to be honest.

To prepare for a porn shoot, the standard rule for males is for them to abstain from ejaculating for at least 2 – 3 days before a shoot. So the night before those 2 or 3 days of abstaining, we always make sure to have sex.

While sex can be a great deal more fun when it’s spontaneous, a few times a year of making it planned is not going to hurt the romance. Sometimes it’s a night of slow sensual lovemaking.

Other times it is the most primal fuck. And when it’s the latter, that night of passion often goes into much of the next day. Those are the times that he abstains from ejaculating for 2 days, instead of 3.

If we get in the mood within those 2 – 3 days of his abstaining, we make use of our teledildonic toys. He uses a Titan by Kiiroo, I use the OhMiBod Fuse, and we pair them together so he can simulate fucking me.

He amazes me as to how he can edge himself. He gets himself right to that edge, then stops. So if I haven’t orgasmed and ejaculated yet, I have to do the rest with the OhMiBod Fuse myself.

What used to surprise me, even more, is that he likes to watch me do it until I come. Concerned that he was sexually frustrating himself even more, although part of what gets me off is the look on his face when he’s watching, I once asked him why he watches me until the end. He said that it puts him more at ease to see my sexual tension is released. So I’m not exploding inside until we have sex after he does his porn scene.

After I get off using my Fuse, we go to bed and spoon all night. Again, I’m amazed at his restraint. Because at various points throughout the night, I’ll wake to feel his cock growing up my butt crack and into the small of my back.

titan by kiiroo vr experience

It kills me to not grind up against him. Since the feel and sight of each other’s erection always gets the other in the mood. And just because I know he has a shoot the following day, that does not curb my horniness.

How does it feel that after those 2 – 3 days of him abstaining? That the first person who gets to experience the ejaculation built from that tension is not me, but someone else?

That is a question a good number of people have asked me over time. Trust me, I know it makes sense to wonder. Those women being the first to feel the warmth of that massive amount of jizz on their skin from days of built-up tension is something I can make peace with. Because I know that she is getting him that once, maybe slightly more if they work together again.

However, I’ve been getting his cumloads for over 5 years now and will continue to do so long after that shoot is done. On my body (like them), but also deep inside my body because Zen does not do internal cumshots. Getting my internal cumshot soon after his scene partner gets hers.

You see, the day of the shoot is one in which those days of abstaining have built up so much sexual tension that Zen and I fuck like rabbits after his shoot. 

As for the cumloads, I get to experience those big tension-filled ones myself. For part of how we keep the sex fresh is by having time to abstain. We both have high sex drives, so we would be doing it almost every day and night if we didn’t. Because seeing each other in various stages of undress, even every day as all couples do sparks our libidos.

So in a nutshell, what is it like to be the male lover of a man in straight porn? I can’t complain. Because like I said, we’re a team. And it doesn’t hurt when your fellow team member is a gorgeous man who keeps you sexually satisfied.

But more importantly, and to the surprise of many, also keeps you romantically satisfied. So this straight porn actor is a man who is the sexual fantasy of many straight women and some gay men but honors me by being my reality.

Written by

LeNair Xavier

LeNair Xavier has studied sex and sexuality by reading up on and observing various sexual behaviors. These observations has led to time in the gay porn industry, and now writing erotic poetry. Tales of his journeys leading to his growing sexual knowledge can be found on his blog, L’s X-Ray Vision.

Follow LeNair on Tumblr

MORE FROM LENAIR:

Embrace Your Intimacy Complexity
lenair xavier kiiroo

The Art of a Homemade Sex Tape
sex tape kiiroo

7 Rules of Sex Shop Etiquette
sex shop kiiroo