Lent is well and truly over and, for those who participate, you’re probably sighing a deep breath of relief!
For those not in the know, Lent is a religious observance among Christians which often involves a length of fasting and the sacrifice of certain luxuries in life as a symbolic parallel to Christ’s sacrifices.
Many still treat Lent as a strictly religious holiday, but in our generation of liberal practice, a lot of people use Lent as an opportunity to see what their life would be like in the absence of something they have come to rely upon and to learn more about themselves.
And the best thing about fasting is that it doesn’t even have to be religious at all. One can choose a set duration of abstinence for pretty much anything they wish in life and then ride the roller coaster of emotions that comes with sudden absence.
Fasting may sound like a scary or dangerous process but it’s actually a pretty common aspect of Western society. How many times have you decided to try a 30-day trial at the Gym (a fast on lethargy)? Or perhaps decided to give up alcohol or cigarettes?
In general, we like to use a set period to try and break habits or make them and as long as we do so in a sensible and sustainable way then it’s generally agreed that such bouts of absence can have noticeable benefits.
If you’re trying to dip your toes into fasting then research has suggested that 21 days is a nice sweet spot for starting a new habit or breaking and old one.
If you’re more of a milestone individual then 1 month may be the better alternative for you—covering those 21 days and then adding some extra time to see how you feel in the last week or so.
If you’re spiritual then 40 days is typically the ‘magic’ number (giving 20 days to break whatever habit you’re targeting and 20 days to form it as a positive gain in your life), and some studies have even suggested a more drastic 66 days.
Ultimately how long you fast for depends on what you’re giving up, what works best for you, and how you feel throughout, but these are some good guidelines.
This is the fun part and it is, of course, highly personal for most.
When deciding what your fast will consist of you’ll need to consider what aspects of your life—or, more specifically in this instance—your sex life that you’re unhappy with or that you’d like to improve upon.
Don’t beat yourself up at this point; all of us have bad habits or things we would like to change but just haven’t found the motivation for. It’s called being human and you should not be critical with yourself for being normal.
And do be sure to include your partner/s in any fasting decision you make. Not only does it allow them to understand what you’re doing but it’ll also allow them to encourage and support you along the way—one of the fundamental benefits of a fast.
As for what to give up? Weeeell we’ve got a few suggestions of our own if you’re receptive.
#1 Your Sexual Apprehensions
Is there a fantasy you’ve been replaying in your mind but are too shy to try?
How about a toy that you’ve been tentatively eyeing up for months?
Of maybe even a special request?
Now is the time to seize the day and throw your cautions to the wind!
For your fasting duration whenever you find something erotic emerge that leaves your stomach lurching and your mind saying ‘I want too, but I’m just not to sure’ respond with a hearty ‘Let’s go for it!’ and see where your spontaneity takes you.
No will always be a valid answer if you start and then find it’s not for you, but you have to act before you can fully take in the situation.
Sexual confidence is bound to follow, in addition to an increased sense of openness and perhaps relief.
So, whatever you’re thinking, go for it! We know you’ve got this.
#2 Boredom In The Bedroom
If you’ve been feeling like your current sexual routine just isn’t working for you anymore then now is the time to break it.
Keep those comfort positions but intersperse them with new positions and experiences. Perhaps even purchase a sexy board game that allows you and your partner/s to take a playful approach to sex.
Another great product for this fast are the 30-day suggestion cards that have be gaining in popularity over recent years. These will give you a prompt every day to try something new—sometimes with regards to romance, other times kink, and so on.
Whatever method you choose to break the boredom just remember to give yourself time to enjoy the difference in routine. This is meant to be a fun experience, after all.
#3 A House Rule
This one is really fun.
Take a rule that is usually applied to your household and defy it in a sexy way.
Do you have a ‘No food in the bedroom’ rule? Now’s the time to explore sploshing and chocolate body paint.
‘No pets in the house’? It’s puppy play time!
‘No loud noises after 8’? Oh, we hope you know where we’re going with this.
The variety and creativity of this fast allows you a safe way to defy your normal conventions while also feeling much more like an addition to your life rather than a fast.
We can’t help but wonder what rules you’ll be breaking in your fast.
#4 Penetrative Sex
For those this applies to, the abstinence of penetrative sex can feel like the most exquisite agony.
This is abstinence in its strictest sense and it really does force you to either sit with your urges or consider different options very quickly.
And different options are out there—providing many familiar and new ways to reconnect with your body and its sexual urges in a different way (Kiiroo being just one great example).
This fast can also be great fun with a partner, allowing for some BDSM dynamics to occur. Need we say more?
The flip-side of the above point, a fast from pleasuring yourself can leave you at the mercy of your partner’s urges and leave you begging for a release.
This will be of interest to those is a sub/dom relationship, but it can also be useful for those who feel like they’ve lost their sexual connection and want to come together again.
As always, there are different ways you can adapt this #NoFap fast, but do try to give it your best attempt. If you’re regularly into self-love then it may be extremely hard, but you may find that you have even more love for yourself come the end of the experience.
We’ve planted a seed for some sexy fasts here, but we know that you’ll be able to come up with many more to keep things dynamic and encourage introspection.
Just remember to give yourself a break between fasts. Trust us when we say that you deserve it.
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