Congratulations! It’s the New Year and, if you’re reading this, then you’re already kicking ass and taking names. This is the time for fresh starts, new beginnings, and revitalized energy. At least that’s what those motivational quotes tell us. Ready to Improve your Love Life?
Ah, yes—motivational quotes—something we’re all perhaps far too familiar with nowadays.
When confronted with motivational quotes so often it’s easy to become jaded to their little gems of wisdom and to give them sincere consideration. Aspirational quotes are all good and well, after all, but how do they actually apply to our lives?
Well, here at Kiiroo we’d like to suggest that maybe there might just be something behind these words of encouragement. In fact, we want you to embrace them and use them to empower your love life—or, to be more specific, to supercharge your sex!
Here are five of our favorites and some tips for what to take away from them.
This motivational quote can mean a lot of things. It speaks of your capabilities; your personal considerations and what you wish to show to the world.
A call to arms.
It’s also a great quote when it comes to sex and what you might wish to achieve or explore!
Have you ever tried literally being somebody that nobody thought you could be?
For pleasure, perhaps, but maybe also just to explore how it feels…
Sexual roleplay is a fantastic way of exploring and introducing new aspects of yourself to your partner (or others, if suitable).
Unconstrained by how you might usually act, sexual roleplay allows you to explore who you could be, how you might present yourself, or even what you’d like to briefly sample but never truly enact to its fullest.
This could be as simple as pretending to be a different individual meeting your partner on a first date or as intricate as adult “puppy play” or the classic pizza delivery fantasy.
The important thing is not to constrain yourself—to embrace the situation fully. Be somebody nobody thought you could be and you may even surprise yourself with the results.
It’s important for any of us to find our voice.
Living a life that is too passive not only leads to personal unhappiness but the unhappiness of those around us too (after all, it’s not pleasant being around someone who holds a growing sadness and resentment over their lack of a voice).
Assertiveness is a skill that we could all benefit from learning with more diligence, and being able to speak up for our sexual desires is as important as anything else.
If you’re not in the right mindset for sex on any given day, let your partner know.
Explain your situation and make your stance clear. Trust me, it’s much better than a ‘No’ without explanation or a blatant lie.
Practice sexual honesty.
You may not always get the reaction you’d like, but people will always know where they stand with you and you’ll always feel like you got to say what matters.
Alternatively, you could take this motivational quote as a chance to find your BDSM voice and explore becoming an assertive and commanding Dominant from time-to-time. Empower yourself and arouse your lover with your clear, concise demands and filthy utterances. Speak for no other but yourself and watch as your partner willingly complies (getting consent to do so first, of course. Nobody likes a bedroom bully.).
This one has a bit more of a zen-ring to it but is equally important.
Although we may not like to think about it, each and every one of us will face some form of sexual difficulty in our lives.
This is just the inevitability of sex, relationships, and life in general.
What matters in these situations isn’t avoidance but, instead, the way in which we choose to meet our troubles and work to accept and overcome them.
In the case of sex this usually involves a lot of difficult situations which have a very intimate and personal impact on us. Things like erectile dysfunction, vaginismus, premature ejaculation, vulvodynia, sexual rejection, performance anxiety, STI’s and so many other physical and mental obstacles.
These aren’t things we can just cut through and attempting to do so will only lead to further frustration and reinforced unhappiness.
Instead, when you find yourself confronted with a sexual issue consider giving it the attention, time, and (most importantly) patience it deserves.
Be forgiving with yourself (and/or your partner), accept that recovery isn’t a linear progress and that there will be bumps along the way, practice compassion and do your research.
In the end, that rock will yield, but only with the right attitude.
Want to try sex toys? Start researching your options and click that buy button! Wish your partner would watch porn with you? Speak to them about it! Are you lusting over an expensive piece of sex tech? Put that first coin in the jar and start saving! Put practical plans in place. Consider what is and isn’t important. It doesn’t matter what you’re doing as long as you’re doing something to achieve your goals. The moment you start is the moment things can begin, and this is applicable in every aspect of life.
Too often we don’t allow ourselves to explore the sexual desires we consider most values. We humor our fleeting moments of lust even less.
Take the time to nurture both of these sexual aspects of yourself and see just what doing without restriction can change for you.
Obvious disclaimer: Don’t do anything illegal or without consent. Always start in the most sensible and practical manner possible and start small if needed. Kiiroo believes in you, and you should too!
And, finally, the most important one in our minds…
This is a rather complicated phrase and may, in and of itself, exist beyond or right at the border of some people’s comfort zones.
But, of course, there is a benefit to sometimes pushing beyond what we consider to be our limits. If handled correctly (ie. on our own terms) it can provide a lot of personal growth and a sense of confidence and empowerment that is unmatched.
Whenever you decide to have that difficult conversation with your partner, you are embodying this quote. Whenever you throw yourself fully into a sexual roleplay, you’re doing the same. In fact, pretty much all of the above quotes can be embodied in this one.
However, there’s also another element to this quote—sometimes meeting your comfort zone is crucial to knowing how to convey it to others.
Let’s face it—all of us will have things that we are absolutely and fundamentally uncomfortable. This may be due to personal values, a particular upbringing, or perhaps some form of past trauma. Whatever the cause, these boundaries need to be known and conveyed to be respected.
Finding the very end of your comfort zone—understanding it, but not always feeling obligated to step over it—will allow you to better take care of your own sexual and mental wellbeing while also making you a more attentive, open, and compassionate lover.
So find that comfort zone, defend it fiercely where need be and locate the areas where you might wish to cross it. And, remember, there is a whole array of motivational quotes ready to help you along the way.
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