A few weeks back…
I am smiling smugly, feeling very pleased with myself.
‘You may as well concede, I have 100% won this round’
‘I know, my gifts are rubbish’
‘If you got even one thing on my list, they won’t be rubbish’
I wondered, after that conversation. Not clothing or jewelry, he isn’t the sort to take notice of sizes of things. That leaves geekery, tech… and sex. He does have great taste in toys; his past efforts have resulted some…delectable memories.
Anal play had never ranked highly for me, so I generally avoided it. He promised to change my mind, I was skeptical to say the least. The eve of my birthday (I can’t remember which), I remember breathing in his scent as he leaned in to kiss me at the door.
It was always the same: fresh yet deep, commanding yet reassuring. He smells of safety and protection; always simultaneously placing me at ease while stirring excitement somewhere deep.
I remember feeling his gaze searing my skin as he watched me unwrap that last box, the added heat of the flush alighting my cheeks. Ah, how it had sparkled, so very pretty, but promising so much more.
I remember the shower we had shared, the intimacy of taking turns to slowly rub each other clean. The massage that followed as he ensured every inch of me was moisturized, working the oil into my muscles. Instilling an almost meditative calmness in me.
I remember him preparing me, gently, liberally, applying lube everywhere it was needed. His kisses, cuddles and caresses, they aroused a desire in me I didn’t realize I was capable of feeling.
‘Are you ok?’
‘More than, thanks for asking’
My breath had sounded loud in that pause, fast and breathy.
‘Are you ready?’
‘Yes. Yes, I think I am.’
I felt a little pressure there, a little moan of need escaped my lips. The pace of his breathing picked up a bit, a subtle expression of his excitement whispering lightly past my ear, sending a shiver down me, and I opened a little for him.
Slowly, millimeter by millimeter, with the utmost care and patience, he let me taste just a little of what I had been missing. It didn’t take much more than that before I was a fully signed up.
Now that had to have been hard thing to wrap. Even with its obvious shape, seeing it unveiled still caught my breath. Not to mention, once I’d let him secure my ankles, with it, ensuring my movement was truly restricted.
Panting with need, practically begging, I lay there bare as he watched me. My skin glistened, highlighted by the moon and star light shining in through the open window. Just enough that my nipples had taken notice. Yes, I’d begged then, for his warmth, his body, his long, thick cock. I wanted, no, needed covering, filling… completing.
Closing the distance between us, he grasped the bar, pulling slightly. The increased tension on my legs caused my back to arch as a delicious shiver rippled through me that had little to do with the cold. His free hand reached up to trace circles around my nipples. His skin was so warm, compared to mine, that his touch left burning trails on my breasts.
He now held himself just above me. He had bound my wrists together behind my head. So now as he lowered his sweet, hot mouth to replace his fingers, the muscles in my arms strained with the impulse to run my hands over his head.
He had always made a study of my body and my responses. He read me then, as he pulled away from his breast worship; our eyes locked. Whatever he saw in mine, he liked; satisfied I was right where he wanted me. Happy with his handiwork, he finally deigned to respond to my plea.
Details of the sweet, sweet oblivion that had followed are hazy; mind-blowing sex literally clears my mind that completely…
Tonight... Christmas Eve
I hear his key in the door, I get goosebumps. There is the sound of some fumbling and a mumbled curse as keys fall. His footfalls stop; I wonder if he...
‘Need any hel-? Oh wow!’
He is craning his neck to the side, to peer around the massive box in his arms, trying to see the floor. I go in to steal a little kiss before retrieving the keys and assuring him the path is clear. Stepping aside to let him pass, I close and lock the door, mind racing wondering what on earth could be inside the box.
It is wrapped in matt black paper with a wide, shiny violet ribbon completing the look—perfectly matching my Christmas décor. He has set it down in center of my living room floor; it is so large I have to turn to shuffle past it. I stop next to where he is standing looking smug; I’m agog.
‘Well? Open it.’
I struggle against the command in his words as, remembering myself, I present the sizeable giftbag of his carefully wrapped gifts, now dwarfed by the box.
Mumbled. I’m suddenly, self-conscious and a little anxious.
‘I hope you like them.’
‘I know I will. But I really must insist.’
My cheeks are glowing. His knack of relaxing me while also keeping me on edge, feeling like a live wire, never ceases to amaze me. I struggle with the bow, a little, as it is made of some kind of grippy material. I have a bag of saved gift-wrapping resources this will make a great addition to.
The paper doesn’t fare as well; it is so securely attached that I quickly give up hopes of retaining it for future use. Under the paper is a plain white lidded box. I glance up at him quizzically, he nods—continue.
I remove the lid; he takes it from me as the floor is now a litter of shredded paper. I notice he has also retrieved the ribbon which has been folded and laid on the sofa; he remembered I like wrapping, sweet.
Inside the box, nestled in mounds of lightly scented tissue paper, are 4 smaller individually wrapped parcels. They are labelled and numbered.
- Marked with a mouth—a jar of kirsch-soaked cherries and some real Turkish delight, mmmmm
- Marked with an ear—a smart speaker and a playlist barcode, aww, so thoughtful
- Marked with an eye—a soft satin, violet blindfold, interesting
- Marked with a nose—a bottle of perfume I have long lusted for, bursting with sultry, smoky roses
I rummage for the final gift I know must be here, nothing. I look up confused.
‘Thank you these are amazing, a hedonist’s dream and so well thought out, but shouldn’t there be a fifth?’
‘You’d think so wouldn’t you…’
I notice the ribbon again now. At some point he had taken into his hands again. The gift tag on the bow has the outline of a woman’s body, I had thought nothing of it before.
He beckons me over with a crook of his finger. As I kiss him my gratitude, he begins to undress me, I let him, I want this. Slowly, deliberately he removes everything, then ties me up in violet ribbon. I see him reach for the blindfold.
I nod a quiet assent as the world goes black and my body responds to his attentions. He gently picks me up, takes me to my room and lays me on the bed.
A pause, my senses are heightened, I search for him. Then I hear the music start. I feel his weight on the bed, with me. I taste cherries in his mouth, then a powdery delight is placed on my tongue . A smell of incense laced with roses fills the air and my mind goes blank—all save for my 5 senses and my desire for him.
‘I want you.’
Forty, and currently identifying as pansexual, sapiosexual, demisexual, a little kinky & polyamorous, Ana of PolyAna Says is just a happy hippy hedonist who enjoys celebrating the pleasures of life. Sex positivity and self-love are her JAM! By day Ana is also a freelancer and solo parent. Follow her on Instagram @anaeidherself